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Dea
30 January 2015 @ 01:24 am
Welcome!
to my thoughts

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Current Location: Indonesia, Jakarta
Current Mood: energeticenergetic
Current Music: Pasta OST. Listen... to you - Cho Kyuhyun
 
 
Dea
19 July 2010 @ 01:00 am


what i've been wondering
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Current Location: Jakarta, Indonesia,
Current Mood: disappointeddisappointed
Current Music: Again & Again - 2pm
 
 
Dea
10 April 2010 @ 09:28 pm
I am sorry for being so rude to you. I know i am such a selfish that i have never thanked you. i just want you to know that i feel so grateful for being you daughter, i dont know what will happen if i have to life this reality without you. i am sorry for being such a spoiled brat. I have a lot to say but i dont have any courages to do it. i write this, i know, you may never read this silly letter, but i believe you understand what's on my heart. I love you mom. i promise i wont fail at life.

Love,
your daughter
 
 
Current Location: Jakarta, Indonesia
Current Mood: thankfulthankful
 
 
Dea
27 March 2010 @ 07:06 pm
If you could eliminate one emotion (anxiety, sadness, jealousy, regret, etc.), would you do it? Why or why not? If so, which one would you choose?

well, i dont think we need to eliminate anything, because without any of that emotions life wud be boring. but to be honest, i may eliminate something if so, that is anxiety, i get anxious easily and i hardly ignore any single unnecessary thing. i want myself to be calmer
 
 
Current Location: Jakarta, Indonesia
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: After School - Bang!
 
 
Dea
10 February 2010 @ 09:43 am
what people tend to react when they know they have the same purpose as i do:

1. The excited one
Yay we've got the same plans! i want to be a model and so do you, what a surprise! and the best thing is, we're going to walk on the same runway and pose on the same red carpet!

2. The supporting one

She'd say: I know, we're gonna make it, let's pray for both of us.

3. The super quiet, quite irritating

i said: hey, i am going to be a journalist! what do you think? i think it'll be great. we're gonna study in the same university, write for either cnm or bbd...
She said: ......
(NO COMMENT while i've spent my all, imagine about both of us...)

4. The Implicitly 'vigour breaker'
Hard to describe this manner, because as it called implicitly. so it's something like blurting unsupporting comments such us suggest you to enter to another university to decrease her competitors. this kind of friends consider you as one of her rivals, she DOESNT want you to get what she also wants to get. what a fox.

5. The worst of all
the most annoying, noisy, sappy, dull, bootsy, jerky, hicky one. Try to make you think twice when you have something fixed on your futureplan. Trembling you down, attempting to make you collapse. Shittiest...

no bashing, i meant writing this just to share what's on my mind, what's ruffling me these days :(
 
 
Current Location: Jakarta, Indonesia
Current Mood: pessimisticpessimistic
Current Music: Godspeed - Dixie Chicks
 
 
 
Dea
24 August 2009 @ 02:04 pm
 
 
 
Current Location: Jakarta, Indonesia
 
 
Dea
28 July 2009 @ 05:14 am
 Ini adalah saat saat dimana gue merasa kalo gue tu benar benar sangat sangat tak kasatmata.
 
1st case: kejadiannya pas pelantikan subsie (subsie kayak organisasi yang mengatasi ekskul2 gitu deh) di sekolah gue. Nah, salah satu aturan kakak kelasnya itu, kita sebagai adik yang akan dilantik dan sedang dikader, diharuskan untuk, mengenal satu sama lain. Lagi pula, menurut gue 'ngenalin' temen lo sendiri adalah wajib apalagi lo satu tim sama mereka. dan ini adalah kegoblokan salah satu temen gue. suatu malam, kita disuruh baris sambil tutup mata. lalu, bikin uler uleran (itu yang megang pundak temen depan kita kayak mau main ular naga panjang). Lalu, tiba tiba temen depan gue (yang gue pegang pundaknya) nanya, 'ini siapa?' terus gue pun jawab, 'dea' lalu dia jawab 'hah dea? siapa tuh?' ANXXXXBEXXXX dasar. aduh gatau deh dia itu goblok apa terlalu ehm, terlalu bangke ckckckck, ud hampir sebulan dikader bareng, masi juga bebel.
 
2nd case: kejadian berikutnya ini baru terjadi tadi. bener bener hari ini tet. jadi tadi pas jerman, ada tes mengarang dan membaca tentang liburan. jadi kita disuruh ngarang sebanya sepuluh kalimat gitu trus disuruh baca keras keras sambil berdiri. terus, kan critanya nih, gue dan teman teman yang minggu lalu nggak ngurusin kegiatan, udah tes. nah tersisalah mereka yang malang belom tes. lalu, mereka panik, nggak ada persiapan, lalu, mereka mulai nyari nyari temen temen yang pada udah ngarang trus mau minta contoh karangan kita kita yang udah atau minta dibantuin kan. ya gue oke oke aja kertas karangan gue dipinjem sama seorang teman, sebut saja B. lalu si B itu bawa kertas gue ke mejanya, lalu datanglah si J, si J nanya ke si A (temen sebangkunya B), 
 
'ini kertas siapa?'
'Dea' jawab si A
'hah siapa?'
'Dea'
'dea siapa?'
(WHAT!!!%$&$#*&%)
'ini dea!' kata si A sambil nunjuk bagian belakang kursi yang gue dudukin.
'oo' kata si J agak agak malu trus kabur nyari bantuan kertas lain.
 
3rd case: terjadi beberapa detik setelah kasus kedua. Sebut saja namanya adalah si E. E adalah cowoknya B. Lalu si E kesulitan membuat karangan, maka ia pun meminta bantuan kekasihnya. lalu sialnya si E, kekasihnya juga kesulitan, maka si E pun memilih untuk melihat sendiri kertas yang oleh si B dijadikan pedoman. Yang tak lain dan tak bukan adalah kertas gue. 
 
'Ini kertas siapa?' tanya E pada A. si B lagi sibuk soalnya.
'Dea'
'hah dea siapa?'
(ini lageee ANXXXXJXXXXX)
'herrgh dea yang ini!' si A kesel gara gara dari tadi banyak anak begi yang gatau dea.
'iih yang namanya dea banyak banget sih' komentar si E bego tanpa dosa.
 
Lalu dengan gatau dirinya lagi si E minta gue ngarangin karangannya! dan ia tidak bilang terima kasih karenanya, padahal you know what, dia gak ada salah satu kalimat pun! sama sekali! jadi intinya karangan gue sukses besar.
 
Jadi, gue sangat sedih akan kebutaan yang dialami tiga orang teman gue di atas. dan juga gue turut sedih atas ketulian yang dua diantara mereka juga alami.si E dan si J yang buta dan tuli maksutnya, secara mereka sekelas sama gue gitu, denger nama gue di panggil guru tiap hari!
 
 
Current Location: Jakarta, Indonesia
Current Mood: pissed offpissed off
 
 
Dea
22 July 2009 @ 12:25 pm
hey it's me dying.
one word can make me smile a bit, it's

'hello'

say it,

Hello Dea!

i'll be fine! dont do it unless you care a lot.

hi, it's me frustated
one thing can drive me amused, it's

coffee

boil it, make it perfect, cold or hot, both are good.
dont do it, if you hate me

Hello, it's me crying
dont wipe my tears (i know you wont)
i'll wipe it by myself

just bring me some DVDs and i'll be okay, (i know you wont, a copy one is accepted)

Try ask this to me, 'Wots up?'
i'll say that i madly wanna write a thousand of smiley, here, like this wot i meant: XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

for instance:
May i die?

there're too many things to be understand, written, memorized, read, expressed, recalled, presentated, talked, and done.
 
 
 
Dea
12 July 2009 @ 12:01 pm
 everything goes wrong. i know it's such a childish thing to cry like this. but let's see wot has happened to me recently.
 
first of all, my vaca sucks. went to visit grandma in nowhere.
then i've got A good news. i got good grades.
after that, bad news again. it's about my new class in senior year. bye bye happiness, blissful, i am going to suffer a lot and gotta study like dying! heeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllppp! Hell hell hell. the new class.. cant describe it here :((((((((((((((((((

im going to medic school but i feel like i have no desire to do it. FINE. i think i deserve all this kind of mess.
 
im sorry dear Lord. i've been so much dull and sap, and rude.
promise, i'll make it good and big and versatile and cookie cutter perfect and i'll change everything that is happening here.
 
please my Lord give me some hints to make my life a lotta better.
i believe for sure, it's smile and also hope and pray, strong will? maybe.
 
i am going 16, i'll be wiser soon. sure thing.
 
 
Current Location: Jakarta, Indonesia
Current Mood: frustratedfrustrated
 
 
Dea
10 July 2009 @ 02:43 am
Ini benar-benar menyedihkan. jadi critanya saya membuat icons. lalu saya publikasikan. tapi, nggak ada yang komenin. oke. mungkin itu kesalahan karena iconsnya norak semua. tapi. aaaa gatau deeh. posting icons dimana-mana tapi ga ada yang mengapresiasikan! apa maksutnya ini Ya Allah?

oh aku tau! aku tidak dibolehkan kuliah di desain grafis, melainkan kuliah kedokteran sesuai harapan dan doa ibu.

terimakasih Ya Allah karena telah menunjukkan jalan yang lurus dengan restu 100%  autentik dari orang tua.

ternyata barusan gue buka, sebuah forum tempat gue mengepost icons. ada seseorang yang berbaik hati ngasi komen! OHMY GOD! Ya Allah, aku senang sekali, dan ia memakai salah satu icons ku ahahahhahaha ya ampun ya ampun (padahal baru satu yang komen)

*back to reality

begitulah. seneng banget kan gue padahal baru satu komen. satu di Lj satu di forum
tapi benerkan ternyata gue kurang diterima di dunia perphotoshoppan. ya sudahlah
jadi gue balik ke dunia perbiologian gitu? tapi kan di dunia perbiologian ga ada changmin! masa aku mau bikin icons bunglon! ga asik! ga ganteng! (astaghfirulloh, maafkan aku bunglon, kamu indah kok meskipun ga ganteng)

baiklah aku akan beristirahat dari proses pemaksaan kreativitas ini.
jadi bener deh Allah tu udah nyiptain kita dengan kemampuan masing-masing ya, jadi ga bisa dipaksain.
gw mencoba nulis fanfic, tapi ga ada yang komen. oke.
gw mengepost icons masterpiece gue dan ternyata hasilnya pun nihil.
dan asal anda tahu, dulu ada seorang teman saya yang ngefens banget sama blog ini dan sekarang sampahnya diaaa dia berhenti membaca blog saya gara-gara saya nulis fanfic versi indonesia!!!!

kenapa?
1 LJ ku dicampakkan teman-teman
2 Liburanku sangat sarat akan kenyebelinan
3 Iconsku tak mendapat apresiasi yang didambakan
4 aku bentar lagi masuk sekolah

sebentar lagi gue stop posting posting di LJ, apalagi bikin icons atau melanglang buana di forum atau online msn atau mainan facebook atau mimpiin Changmin
 
 
Current Location: Jakarta, Indonesia
Current Mood: disappointeddisappointed